She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
