Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
