nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
