Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
