Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
