Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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