your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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