So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
