'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
