"it" just moved
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
