Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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