You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
