i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
