doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
