TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
