Can i not drive my cunt home
Me. At least after what I've been through.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Randomize
