I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Randomize
