I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
