Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
she looked like the before picture.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
