Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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