can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
