"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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