we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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