it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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