Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
