My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize