By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
