fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
