i think my mom watched the whole time
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
