Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
