happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
