what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
