Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Randomize
