a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
