So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
