He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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