That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
