I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
