just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
