Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Randomize
