You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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