I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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