I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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