I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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