Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
It was a blind-side dick pic.
It's shark week go big or go home
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
