Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
