why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize