Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Randomize
