I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
17 year olds will be the death of me.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
