friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
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